Duck Duck Cougar?
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Randomize
