well you can't waste a boner
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
