I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
