"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
