If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Little spoons don't ask big questions
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
