If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Randomize