Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
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