People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
