It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
zippers are such a cool invention
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Randomize
