i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Randomize
