Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Randomize
