She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
