you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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