why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Randomize
