Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Randomize
