Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
