Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Randomize
