Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Randomize
