Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
