apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
