I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Randomize
