i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
