come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
