they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
