So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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