The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
i black out too much to be "responsible"
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize