Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
