But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Found your dick twin last night
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Randomize
