i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
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