there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize