I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Randomize
