what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
