This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
Randomize
