tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
