And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I have grass duct taped all over my body
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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