can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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