I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Randomize
