I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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