Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
