So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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