check it out our google latitudes are spooning
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Randomize
