Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
