The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
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