He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
