C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
