Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Randomize
