Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize