The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
