The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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