Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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