It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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