i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
