he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Randomize
