It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Randomize
