i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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